Taste Buds Transplant

Starting Weight 10/5/13: 187
Weigh in 10/19/13: -1.6 lbs (two week total)
Current weight: 185.4

So for my "first" weigh in last week I was down 2 lbs, this week I'm up 0.4 lb. A little frustrating since my week wasn't that different from the first. There are few changes I will make this week, so hopefully I will be down next weigh in.

I'm convinced sometimes that this would be a lot easier on me if I liked more vegetables. There are a few that I like and I try to use them as much as possible but if there were more I liked, I would have a lot more variety in my life. I wish that I could have a taste buds transplant. Get the taste buds of a skinny person. It's not just vegetables, other healthy foods like fish I don't like either.

A woman at the WW meeting today reached her 70 lbs mark. She said when she first decided to lose weight, she went to a party and she went around the room looking at the plates of the skinny people and decided to eat the things they ate. My problem isn't not knowing what to eat, but liking the things I should be eating.

I've tried to make myself eat things I don't like in hopes of getting used to it. I mean it's worked for other things in the past. I used to hate things like coffee, beer, and unsweetened tea. Now I love them. Maybe that only works for drinks, because it sure hasn't worked so far with food.

Losing Weight Is 98% Mental and 2% Eating Right and Exercise

As the title of this blog says losing weight is 98% mental and 2% eating right and exercising. Please note: I did no scientific research to come up with those numbers, I just pulled them out my bum but they are 100% accurate.

Tomorrow I am going back to Weight Watchers with my head held in shame. What a fool I have been thinking I could do this on my own and for other things. Although, originally quiting WW was more about money than giving up, but once I quit I basically gave up. I tried for about a month back in July to do this on my own, and then realized I'm too weak of the mind to do it all on my own.

In all honesty, I'm still not sure if I'm ready mentally for this. I am not optimistic and as determined as I was when I joined WW in February 2012. I'm torn between no longer wanting to be overweight, to be thin again and not really giving a damn. I've been dealing with depression for a while now and it is really hard to get in the right mind set while depressed.

I don't see the depression going away as long as I'm in as much pain as I am and it keeps getting worse. However, if I don't go back to WW soon, I'm going to put back on all the weight I lost. That's not an exaggeration either. I've put on at least 17 lbs in the last year. 17 lbs (possibly more) in 1 year! Holy crapballs. That's nearly half the weight I had lost!

So as you can see, I really don't have a choice. I need to get this under control before it's too late. I'm just foreseeing a lot more downs than up this time around.